The key to listening is to learn how
How do we learn? Anyone can learn to do anything. Do you believe it? The answer is yes. We are products of our own environment. Anyone can learn new, and change old habits through spaced repetition. Even a parrot learns to speak English through spaced repetition education. Think what could you learn and accomplish for the better in your personality and character if you can just decide to change and were patient enough to work hard until you developed a new habit. It's true! We learn through repetition
One of life's, most embarrassing moments has happened to all of us. The moment the teacher calls on you and you don't know what the teacher was talking about because you were talking. You were talking when you should have been listening.
Why is learning to listen so important?
Because you can't learn much with your mouth open. Whatever you have to say has to be something you already know.
You'll never learn all you need to know in life if all you do is talk. I know that I need to stop talking and learn to listen but when I have friends that are visiting but don't talk I feel it's too quite which it makes me feel uncomfortable so I talk and talk. I don't know why they cone over and don't engage in conversation. Maybe it's because as long as they've known me I can't shut up.
Are you hard of hearing?
Are a lot if people telling you things like: "How many times do I have to tell you?" or "Are you hard of hearing?" Maybe there's a reason. Maybe their frustration with your inability to understand is merited.
Maybe you aren't concentrating on what you are being told. To use another one of those sayings, maybe it "goes in one ear and out the other" without ever being imprinted on the pathways of your brain.
The mental art of listening:
Let's talking about the mental art of listening. One of the most valuable parts you will ever learn in your life in your life is the art of really hearing what it is other people are trying to tell you. You can never remember what other people are saying if you are just formulating in your mind what you are going to reply as they talk. I think we have all been here at one time or point in our lives.
Therefore, listen to capture and understand, not to respond. Concentrate on what other people are trying to say to you. Let it register in your mind. Listen as though you will be asked to repeat it to someone else. Nobody likes to tell people the same thing over and over again. So get it right the first time.Listen----don't just hear!
The conversation hog:
Do you know of any conversation hogs? (I admit I can be more than I'd like to) People who never let anyone else talk. They seem to have strong opinions on just about everything. You could throw them a subject or just and they would babble on as if they were the authority on it, never letting anyone get in a word.
Here's the big secret about having friends and keeping friends. Most people like to talk to themselves and they want somebody to listen to them. If all you ever do is talk and talk, you'll see the other person's attention start to wander. Don't take more of a conversation than your fair share. If you want to have friends and influence people, ask questions that get others to talk about themselves. To deal with stress read this post.
You don't accomplish anything by always talking about yourself but you'll be surprised how popular you become by showing interest in what the other person is saying and doing. If you make him or hers feel like they are important to you, you'll see instant friendships starting.
Don't look at every conversation you have as a chance to talk about yourself, and what you are wanting and doing. Instead, try to listen and learn. When others are talking, don't just be reloading your mouth to talk, let them know you hear what they're saying. Listen to learn. People don't care how much you know until they know how much you care.
Do you know any know-it-alls?
You know the type of person who acts like they know everything, who act like, " There's nothing you can teach me," or "they won't stop talking about something that they feel your input is unless because they know it and all and it's written in stone.
When I was writing this over the weekend I had an encounter of exactly this type of person. She told me how to heal faster with my bone growth using this natural healing light. I wanted to explain to her how the reality of it was medically impossible but she is this type of person but even worse because not one word could you even say to get her to listen. I bet you if she was on fire and she still wouldn't listen. A conversational hog. I had to hide in the craft store and wait until she got away from the tape section because that's whet I was only getting which throughout the store you could hear her and not once did the man with her ever say much but yes or maybes.
They don't know everything ---no one does! The people who think they do are the biggest fools of all. They are missing out on learning, on progressing.
They are easy to spot. They walk around with their hands in their hands, maybe lean up against a wall to talk, with their heads tilted back a little, they never seem to look you in the eyes when they talk to you instead they seem to ignore anyone or anything around them. They think the image of the experienced, sophisticated., " I'm-too-good-for-this" look makes them look smarter, cooler. But they are wrong. It's all an act based on insecurity.
What they've really done is strangled their enthusiasm. They've let themselves become dull, life has become boring. If you're feeling that way, get the zest back in your life. Realize there is still a lot to see in the world and a lot to learn. Get interested in something you don't know everything about. Become green again. Green things keep growing -- ripe things go rotten.
With determination,patience, and spaced repetition you can improve your abilities to the level you dreamed about. It's true! You can if you think you can---but only if you do what you think you think you can't.
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Try something new today.
Try these new ways to start learning. Treat everyone you see and meet as if they are perfect. Don't be critical. Look beyond all the imperfections you are usually quick to notice. Even if you know their personal faults and weaknesses, try and put them out of your mind. It won't be easy but overlook the strange clothes they might be wearing today, their out-of-style haircuts or lack of height. Make yourself see them as perfect, each one has a unique, creation with a unique reason for being there. Don't notice all the imperfections you usually do. Realize that real beauty and character comes from within.