My personal losses to suicide and what you can learn about it

My personal losses to suicide and what you can learn about it

The very idea that someone wants to commit suicide and die is scary. Suicide is not an easy topic to talk about. But talking about suicide does save lives. But if talking about it can save one person from it by talking about it, isn’t it worth it, especially if that someone is you.

I believe people living with suicidal ideation feel hopeless. They are hurting so badly and want nothing more than to end the pain. They can’t ever believe or imagine that pain will ever go away. They don’t see that light at the end of a very dark and lonely place they have found themselves down. Have you ever felt this way?

List of feelings

  • loneliness

  • rejection

  • abuse

  • deep deep depression

  • suffering from tragedies that are to hard to live with

  • guilt

  • helplessness

  • hopelessness

Share your thoughts on why someone may feel like suicide

It’s not uncommon for a person’s circumstances or their self-image to cause someone to think the negative side of their life and negatively about themselves. I think people think about committing suicide because they are unable to find any reason to make their life worthwhile living. They think their problems are unsolvable and they out of control completely.

This past Saturday a week ago I found out my oldest brother commit suicide. I was notify two later when they him, self inflected gun shot to the head. This is not my first time dealing with this. My father (step-father) commit suicide 11 years ago on September 27, 1007. My brothers and I found him with a self inflected gun shot to the head also. WHY? is the biggest question especially without a note. My dad never showed signs of it as for my brother he did and we all tried to help but in the end I nor my sister could save him. He had most of all the feelings I listed above.

I miss both my dad and brother everyday. But my brother had overwhelming depression, self-doubt, and was hopeless feeling that his life wasn’t going to get any better. He struggled with it for the past months and just couldn’t see the light at the end of that dark tunnel he was in. He was a strong, proud man with a huge heart that would help anyone and he loved his friends and family. My family has problems most stem from my mom and her own mental illness. I take comfort in the fact that he is a peace now and the days of him battled his demons are over. Not one minute goes by that I don’t wish I could have saved him. My sister and I tried but in the end it just didn’t help.

If you know of anyone suffering and thinking of suicide try to get them professional help. See the signs and most of all try to do what you can and realize if it happens it’s not your fault. Don’t feel guilty!